matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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