There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
