can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
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