i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Randomize
