i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
