On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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