U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
