I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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