you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize