I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
then he tried to convert me to islam
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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