in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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