WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
