at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
