just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
