What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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