Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
