wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
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