I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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