he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
