Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
We're too hungover to prance.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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