Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
