hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
