well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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