Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
