Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
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