Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
