If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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