i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize