My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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