You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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