What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
