Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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