Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Randomize
