It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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