He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
