Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
You need Xanax blowdarts
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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