Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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