Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
