what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
