So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
