i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
My bed smells like the plague
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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