either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Randomize
