I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
