I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
