on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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