Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
