Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
