Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
where are my eyebrows?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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