i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
