Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
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